| There’s evil in your town
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| Though you may not know it’s there
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| It never makes a sound
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| It just creeps up your underwear
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| You can find it in your restaurants
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| Underneath the tablecloth
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| You can find it in your old haunts
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| In a can of chicken broth
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| Sometimes it shows in daylight
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| For everyone to see
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| We gotta join the fight against S-M-U-T!
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| S-M-U-T (Smut!)
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| It’s seepin' in your mind
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| S-M-U-T (Smut-smut!)
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| So easy to find
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| S-M-U-T (Smutty smut!)
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| It’s wicked and it’s foul
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| S-M-U-T (Smuttitty smut!)
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| It’s enough to make you howl
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| My daddy was a baker
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| His buns he liked to show
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| My mama was a Cosmo girl
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| She sucked up daddy’s dough
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| My girlfriend is a call girl
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| She makes my carrot grow
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| She does it like a tractor
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| That’s why they call her 'ho'
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| McDonald’s have a hunk of meat
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| They call a quarter pound
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| Well, honey, I got the same damn thing
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| Why don’t you stick around
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| S-M-U-T (Smut!)
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| It’s seepin' in your mind
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| S-M-U-T (Smut-smut!)
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| So easy to find
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| S-M-U-T (Smutty smut!)
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| It’s wicked and it’s foul
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| S-M-U-T (Smuttitty smut!)
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| It’s enough to make you howl
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| Good morning, boys and girls. |
| Ah, I see you’re alone. |
| Well, turn your stereo up
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| real loud, make yourself real small, and let your mind drift away to poetry
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| corner
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| Are you small enough to read between the lines?
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| Well, here’s a poem we can really get into:
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| I like little pussy
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| I like little pussy
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| Her coat is so warm
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| And if I don’t hurt her
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| She’ll do me no harm
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| So I’ll not pull her tail
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| Nor drive her away
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| But pussy and I
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| Very gently will play
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| She shall sit by my side
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| And I’ll give her some food
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| And she’ll love me, because
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| I’m gentle and good
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| I’ll pet little pussy, and then she will purr
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| And then show her things, for my kindness to her
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| I never will vex her, or make her displeased
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| Puss doesn’t like to be worried or teased
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| I like little pussy… heheh
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| I like little pussy
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| I like little pussy
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| Her coat is so warm
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| And if I don’t hurt her
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| She’ll do me no harm
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| S-M-U-T (Smut!)
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| It’s seepin' in your mind
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| S-M-U-T (Smut-smut!)
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| So easy to find
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| S-M-U-T (Smutty smut!)
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| It’s wicked and it’s foul
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| S-M-U-T (Smuttitty smut!)
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| It’s enough to make you howl
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| Balls
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| Jugs
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| Knobs
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| Knockers
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| Peter
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| Dick
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| Screw!
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| Buns!
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| Nuts to you!
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| S-M-U-T (Smut!)
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| It’s seepin' in your mind
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| S-M-U-T (Smut-smut!)
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| So easy to find
|
| S-M-U-T (Smutty smut!)
|
| It’s wicked and it’s foul
|
| S-M-U-T (Smuttitty smut!)
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| It’s enough to make you howl |