| I was datin' some girl from Dayton |
| When I got a little noisy with someone else from Boise |
| I did some yoga in Saratoga |
| Wound up with lumbago from San Diego |
| It got a little clammy one night in Miami |
| Made me wish again to be back in Michigan |
| Got too cute that time in Butte |
| Finally hit my quota in Sarasota |
| I wanna stop all this frequent flying |
| Stay clear of those friendly skies |
| Too tired of all this trying |
| I need a map to keep track of my lies |
| No more rental cars |
| And mini-bars |
| Macadamia jars |
| And five-star motels |
| Had a folly one night in Raleigh |
| Man it was scenic, on down in Phoenix |
| I went bonkers in Yonkers |
| But it was costin' too much in Boston |
| I wanna shredder this rail pass |
| Gotta get back on the right side of the track |
| I wanna switch directions fast |
| It’s just easier to stick to the facts |
| No more don’t tells |
| And won’t tells |
| I’m done with |
| These five-star motels |
| I’m gonna pull the wheels off of this wheel estate |
| Park it on a pretty piece of land |
| Find a hometown girl that I can show the world |
| And tell the boys that I’m leaving the band |
| I kept a stash |
| Of petty cash |
| For a wedding bash |
| At the finest hotel |
| We were playin' some bars one night on Mars |
| When a gal from Pluto lookin' for a little judo |
| I started to swoon, orbiting her moon |
| If I lived on Jupiter, I couldn’t have been stupider |
| I can’t blame you for what you see |
| You are light years ahead of me |
| I messed around with re-entry |
| We’re just not from the same galaxy |
| It’s just the way I am |
| Sorry ma’am |
| But I’ll be damned to |
| Five-star… |
| I won’t tell |
| If you don’t tell |
| It’s just as well |
| In five-star… |
| There’s no hope |
| It’s the way I cope |
| I stole the soap |
| From the five-star motel |