| Well, if birds flew underwater, If a dollar bill was a dime |
| Boy wouldn’t things be crazy |
| But maybe then you’d come around some time |
| If steamships flew the skyways, and honey wasn’t made by the bee |
| If black was blue, if I was you, I’d come back to me |
| There’s no way for you to know |
| How much that I miss you so |
| The world’d have to turn outside in |
| For you to ever be mine again |
| Well now if airplanes all flew backwards |
| And the moon was at the bottom of the sea |
| If one was two, If I was you, I’d come back to me |
| What if everything got reversed, poor folks ate caviar |
| And rich folks took to riding on Santa Fe boxcars |
| My hopes for your returning look hopeless as can be |
| If one was two, If I was you, I’d come back to me |
| There’s no way for you to know |
| How much that I miss you so |
| The world’d have to turn outside in |
| For you to ever be mine again |
| Well now if polar bears wore derbies, and penguins ivy league |
| If are was you, if I was you, I’d come back to me |
| If one was two, If I was you, I’d come back to me |
| If egg was foo, if I was you, you’d be too young for me |