| Well the government’s made a document
 | 
| To help prevent embarrassment
 | 
| And in the event of an accident
 | 
| Catching us with our trousers down
 | 
| It’s no use to you when you’re dead
 | 
| Nor even when alive
 | 
| And the name of this piece of paper is
 | 
| Protect and survive
 | 
| So when the nukes come raining down
 | 
| It’s great to be alive, well
 | 
| World War Three can be such fun
 | 
| If you protect and survive
 | 
| Protect and survive
 | 
| Well a nuclear strike can be recognised
 | 
| It would stand out in a crowd
 | 
| There’s a flash, then a bang, then a blast of heat
 | 
| Then a bloody great mushroom cloud
 | 
| So if you happen to see one at the end of your street
 | 
| Would you please pick up the telephone
 | 
| And inform your local police
 | 
| So when the nukes come raining down
 | 
| It’s great to be alive, well
 | 
| World War Three can be such fun
 | 
| If you protect and survive
 | 
| Protect and survive
 | 
| Put sticky tape on your windows
 | 
| Block your ears and close your eyes
 | 
| But it won’t make a blind bit of difference
 | 
| You won’t have to watch yourself fry
 | 
| If you find yourself in the target zone
 | 
| And you haven’t got a shelter
 | 
| Take a spade into the garden
 | 
| And dig like merry hell, sir
 | 
| So when the nukes come raining down
 | 
| It’s great to be alive, well
 | 
| World War Three can be such fun
 | 
| If you protect and survive
 | 
| Protect and survive
 | 
| They’ve got strategic ICBM’s
 | 
| Both theatre and tactical
 | 
| With independently targeted
 | 
| Multiple re-entry vehicles
 | 
| Backfire bombers, Polaris sub’s, cruise missiles
 | 
| And the boys who hang around the Pentagon
 | 
| Can’t wait to use these toys
 | 
| So when the nukes come raining down
 | 
| It’s great to be alive, well
 | 
| World War Three can be such fun
 | 
| If you protect and survive
 | 
| Protect and survive
 | 
| When Armageddon gets underway
 | 
| And the rockets come pouring down
 | 
| All the bloody politicians who started it
 | 
| Will scuttle off underground
 | 
| And when they finally re-emerge
 | 
| With no life to be found
 | 
| They can administrate the rubble
 | 
| And they can order each other around
 | 
| So when the nukes come raining down
 | 
| It’s great to be alive, well
 | 
| World War Three can be such fun
 | 
| If you protect and survive
 | 
| Protect and survive
 | 
| For they give us a four-minute warning
 | 
| When the rockets are on their way
 | 
| To give us time to panic and Christians time to pray
 | 
| So when you hear the siren’s going
 | 
| Place your head between your thighs
 | 
| Whilst maintaining this posture
 | 
| You can make a final gesture
 | 
| And with a little muscular pressure
 | 
| You can kiss your arse goodbye
 | 
| So when the nukes come raining down
 | 
| It’s great to be alive, well
 | 
| World War Three can be such fun
 | 
| If you protect and survive
 | 
| Protect and survive
 | 
| Protect and… |