| I wake up half the time, I don’t know where I am
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| For five minutes I think
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| «What country? |
| What city? |
| What hotel am I in?»
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| For five minutes I think
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| «Is that a wild animal scratching around next to my bed?
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| Is there a large rat or raccoon or a squirrel that broke in?»
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| I stumble around the room, touching the walls, feeling around
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| Feeling around in the dark and I feel and I feel
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| Until I find the light switch and I turn it on
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| I recognize my cat and there’s a beautiful woman laying in my bed
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| It is you, my head is now clear
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| Wait I’m wrong, I thought it was clear but I’m all alone
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| There’s a guitar and recording gear in here
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| Okay, now I realize I’m in a hotel room in San Francisco
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| I stayed here once with a girl
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| When she was on tour in San Francisco long before
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| That’s really all I remember, this hotel
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| Was that night with her long before
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| My engineer’s limping around because he messed up his knee
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| In a mosh pit the night before
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| He’s blaming it on me because I wouldn’t let him
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| Come over and watch the McGregor fight at my apartment
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| «I already have my girlfriend over,» I told him
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| «It's the last night together before the Marc Hopkins sessions»
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| The carpet is gold, the walls are yellow, and the curtains are pink
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| The carpet is gold, the walls are yellow, and the curtains are pink
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| The carpet is gold, the walls are yellow, and the curtains are pink
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| The carpet is gold, the walls are yellow, and the curtains are pink
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| Now I’m back from Ireland, I’m totally stoned on jet lag permanently
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| My clock is different from day to day and will be for the duration of my life
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| Lately I go to bed at 7 o’clock in the morning, wake up at about 4 PM
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| It’s dark in New Orleans by 5:30 and I walk across Coliseum Square
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| I’ll get an iced tea at Mojo on Magazine and I just sit there for a bit
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| And I come back and from my window, I see the Pontchartrain Hotel
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| The sign lit up like it always is, neon green
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| And I just finished the book by John Connolly, He
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| And I got choked up at the end
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| Like I did at the end of his other book, The Book of Lost Things
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| At the end when Stan Laurel hears the Pacific Ocean waves crashing
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| In his mind, it takes him to his past with Oliver Hardy and the audience
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| clapping
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| And I’m listening to Nels Cline’s Lovers
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| I’m watching news about mudslides and snowstorms in the east coast
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| And other bothers like everybody fingerpointing
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| Saying somebody did something wrong
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| I don’t like the news anymore so I pick up a remote and I click it off
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| And I’m falling asleep, and now I’m in a dream state
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| I’m back in San Francisco, walking around my apartment
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| Is this an earthquake that I’m feeling?
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| And my guitars are falling all over the place
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| And my floors are rising to the ceiling
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| And as it’s getting closer to the ceiling, my heart is beating faster and faster
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| I run to the kitchen, grab some food and some bottled water
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| Before I exit my apartment fast
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| I look at the fruit bowl and there’s an unbearably loud hum
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| Coming from the cable car tracks
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| The oranges are yellow, the lemons are green, and the cable car goes vroom-vroom
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| The oranges are yellow, the lemons are green, and the cable car goes vroom-vroom
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| The oranges are yellow, the lemons are green, and the cable car goes vroom-vroom
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| The oranges are yellow, the lemons are green, and the cable car goes vroom-vroom
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| In my dream, I walked into the SPCA and somebody asked
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| «Mark, do you have pets?,» I said, «Yes, I do»
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| And she says, «Well, what kind of pets?»
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| And I said, «Well, take a guess»
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| She guesses and she guesses and I said
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| «Well you’re wrong, I have very unique pets»
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| She says, «How are they different?»
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| I said, «Well, let me show you a video of them»
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| And she said, «Okay, let me watch a video of them»
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| And I show her the video and my pets' eyes are bulged out all frightened
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| Like Mia Farrow’s eyes in Rosemary’s Baby
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| When she was being fucked by Satan
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| My kitty cat barks, my duck goes quack, and my puppy dog goes meow
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| My kitty cat barks, my duck goes quack, and my puppy dog goes meow
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| My kitty cat barks, my duck goes quack, and my puppy dog goes meow
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| My kitty cat barks, my duck goes quack, and my puppy dog goes meow
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| My friend said, «Mark, I know you’re leaving tonight
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| But don’t you have a child to look after?»
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| I said, «Yeah, he’s a smart kid
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| He wants to grow up and be an actor or a movie director
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| Steve Railsback is his favorite actor in the world, we watch his movies together
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| My son’s favorite movies are The Devil’s Rejects, Ed Gein, and Helter Skelter»
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| My friend said, «Well, who’s your babysitter?»
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| I said, «Don't worry about it, that’s my business, he’s my neighbor»
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| I said, «Look, I gotta go, I just called my taxi, my son’s gonna be just fine
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| Talk to you later, alligator»
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| I got a babysitter coming, I live at 666 Post, and my neighbor is… zoom
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| I got a babysitter coming, I live at 666 Post, and my neighbor is… zoom
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| I got a babysitter coming, I live at 666 Post, and my neighbor is… zoom
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| I got a babysitter coming, I live at 666 Post, and my neighbor is… zoom |