| It was four in the morning when he knocked on my door
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| «I'm sorry to wake you up, I was about to pass by your porch
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| But then I saw the light
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| It’s my first visit here, could you show me around?
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| I’ve always feared the city and I’m terrified to face it before the dawn»
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| I feel you my friend, one never chooses to come to Rock Bottom
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| So John and I left the house for some action
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| And when we got on the main street
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| I was about to pass by Ol' William
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| But John asked me to pull over
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| He said, «If I was him I’d like someone to stop»
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| So we stopped
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| Old Dirty William asked for a couple of bucks:
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| «Sorry lad it ain’t been my year,»
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| He said, «I'd trade one of your worst days for one of my best, anytime»
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| «Well, we’re not gonna fight over who’s the most miserable
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| Jump in the car»
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| And just when I think we’ve hit Rock Bottom
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| We ain’t seen nothing yet
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| The Three Musketeers wandering around
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| Passed you in your bright skinny dress on the side of the road
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| Waiting for a miracle
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| I called out to you that we’re all in the same boat
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| Brothers in pain and sisters in misery
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| Hoping salvation is out there beyond the yellow brick road
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| But just when we thought we were out of Rock Bottom
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| It might have only been the eye of the storm
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| Up there someone’s laughing their ass off
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| «Go ahead, make plans, and keep raging when they blow up in smoke
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| As if you’ve got it all under control»
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| And don’t forget to stop by our gift shop
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| But if you’ve learned nothing from it now
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| Well we’ll see you again soon
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| 'Cause no matter where you are, you’re two steps from Rock Bottom |