| I never really understood just why
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| How to throw an investment in the dark gray sky
|
| Like it never really happened at all when it started
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| Guess I’m not halfhearted
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| I wake up every day to the bright morning sun
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| I fall asleep every night think of things that I’ve done
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| I think of all the people and how different I could have become
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| I could’ve been a doctor, I could’ve been a nurse
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| I could’ve been better, but I could’ve been worse
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| Ever since the beginning, I’ve just been self-made and high-strung
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| So I picked up a guitar and I picked up a pen
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| And instead of going out, I chose to stay in
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| I never slept around and I never really got into drugs
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| I had too much self-respect to have respect from my peers
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| So they called me anorexic and laughed at my tears
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| Only a lesbian who understood an outcast ever gave me a hug
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| I never really understood just why
|
| How to throw an investment in the dark gray sky
|
| Like it never really happened at all when it started
|
| Guess I’m not halfhearted
|
| I hated 'em for a while for the pain I had endured
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| And they asked me for friendship, as if that was the cure
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| I tried to feel better, so I went out to every venue and played
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| I got on TV, and I got on the news
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| Kept writing my songs, and racking up views
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| I forgot to remember them and that was when I truly forgave
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| Because it’s not about their actions, it’s how you react
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| Do you silently fight or do you just step back?
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| Because haters only hate a threat that makes them feel weak
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| And it took me years, through the Xanax and booze
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| To understand the life you live is the life that you choose
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| Walk the walk, and practice what you preach
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| I never really understood just why
|
| How to throw an investment in the dark gray sky
|
| Like it never really happened at all when it started
|
| Guess I’m not halfhearted
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| 'Cause it’s about finding strength
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| In the mess that you make
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| Writing your story and filling the page
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| The highs and the lows
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| And the scars that you show or you hide
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| You can self-medicate
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| Or trash talk and hate
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| But you’re the only one that can stand in your way
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| No matter where you’re from, I’m always on your side
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| I never really understood just why
|
| How to throw an investment in the dark gray sky
|
| Like it never really happened at all when it started
|
| Guess I’m not halfhearted
|
| No, I never really understood just why
|
| How to throw an investment in the dark gray sky
|
| Like it never really happened at all, when it started
|
| Guess I’m not halfhearted |