| I don’t think I could find a way to make it on this earth
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| What’s up, family? |
| Yeah, it’s yo cousin Carl, man, just givin' you a call, man.
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| I know you been havin' a lot on yo mind lately, and I know you feel like,
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| you know, people ain’t been prayin' for you. |
| But you have to understand this,
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| man, that we are a cursed people. |
| Deuteronomy 28: 28 says, «The Lord shall
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| smite thee with madness, and blindness, and astonishment of heart.
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| «See, family, that’s why you feel like you feel like you got a chip on your
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| shoulder. |
| Until you finally get the memo, you will always feel that way…
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| Why God, why God do I gotta suffer?
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| Pain in my heart carry burdens full of struggle
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| Why God, why God do I gotta bleed?
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| Every stone thrown at you restin' at my feet
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| Why God, why God do I gotta suffer?
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| Earth is no more, won’t you burn this muh’fucka?
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| I don’t think I could find a way to make it on this earth
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| (Reversed)
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| I beat yo ass, keep talkin' back
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| I beat yo ass, who bought you that?
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| You stole it, I beat yo ass if you say that game is broken
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| I beat yo ass if you jump on my couch
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| I beat yo ass if you walk in this house
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| With tears in your eyes, runnin' from Poo Poo and Prentice
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| Go back outside, I beat yo ass, lil nigga
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| That homework better be finished, I beat yo ass
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| Your teachers better not be bitchin' 'bout you in class
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| That pizza better not be wasted, you eat it all
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| That TV better not be loud if you got it on
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| Them Jordans better not get dirty when I just bought 'em
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| Better not hear 'bout you humpin' on Keisha’s daughter
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| Better not hear you got caught up
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| I beat yo ass, you better not run to your father
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| I beat yo ass, you know my patience runnin' thin
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| I got beaucoup payments to make
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| County building’s on my ass
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| Tryna take my food stamps away
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| I beat yo ass if you tell them social workers he live here
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| I beat yo ass if I beat yo ass twice and you still here
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| Seven years old, think you run this house by yourself?
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| Nigga, you gon' fear me if you don’t fear no one else
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| If I could smoke fear away, I’d roll that mothafucka up
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| And then I’d take two puffs
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| I’m high now, I’m high now
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| I’m high now, I’m high now
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| Life’s a bitch, pull them panties to the side now
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| I don’t think I could find a way to make it on this earth
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| I’ll prolly die anonymous
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| I’ll prolly die with promises
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| I’ll prolly die walkin' back home from the candy house
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| I’ll prolly die because these colors are standin' out
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| I’ll prolly die because I ain’t know Demarcus was snitchin'
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| I’ll prolly die at these house parties, fuckin' with bitches
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| I’ll prolly die from witnesses leavin' me falsed accused
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| I’ll prolly die from thinkin' that me and your hood was cool
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| Or maybe die from pressin' the line, actin' too extra
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| Or maybe die because these smokers
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| Are more than desperate
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| I’ll prolly die from one of these bats and blue badges
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| Body slammed on black and white paint, my bones snappin'
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| Or maybe die from panic or die from bein' too lax
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| Or die from waitin' on it, die 'cause I’m movin' too fast
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| I’ll prolly die tryna buy weed at the apartments
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| I’ll prolly die tryna diffuse two homies arguin'
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| I’ll prolly die 'cause that’s what you do when you’re 17
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| All worries in a hurry, I wish I controlled things
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| If I could smoke fear away, I’d roll that mothafucka up
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| And then I’d take two puffs
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| I’ve been hungry all my life
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| I’m high now, I’m high now
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| I’m high now, I’m high now
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| Life’s a bitch, pull them panties to the side now
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| Now…
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| When I was 27, I grew accustomed to more fear
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| Accumulated 10 times over throughout the years
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| My newfound life made all of me magnified
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| How many accolades do I need to block denial?
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| The shock value of my success put bolts in me
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| All this money, is God playin' a joke on me?
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| Is it for the moment, and will he see me as Job?
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| Take it from me and leave me worse than I was before?
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| At 27, my biggest fear was losin' it all
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| Scared to spend money, had me sleepin' from hall to hall
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| Scared to go back to Section 8 with my mama stressin'
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| 30 shows a month and I still won’t buy me no Lexus
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| What is an advisor? |
| Somebody that’s holdin' my checks |
| Just to fuck me over and put my finances in debt?
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| I read a case about Rihanna’s accountant and wondered
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| How did the bad girl feel when she looked at them numbers?
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| The type of shit’ll make me flip out
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| And just kill somethin', drill somethin'
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| Get ill and fill ratchets with a lil' somethin'
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| I practiced runnin' from fear, guess I had some good luck
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| At 27 years old, my biggest fear was bein' judged
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| How they look at me reflect on myself, my family, my city
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| What they say 'bout me reveal
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| If my reputation would miss me
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| What they see from me
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| Would trickle down generations in time
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| What they hear from me
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| Would make 'em highlight my simplest lines
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| I’m talkin' fear, fear of losin' creativity
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| I’m talkin' fear, fear of missin' out on you and me
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| I’m talkin' fear, fear of losin' loyalty from pride
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| 'Cause my DNA won’t let me involve in the light of God
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| I’m talkin' fear, fear that my humbleness is gone
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| I’m talkin' fear, fear that love ain’t livin' here no more
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| I’m talkin' fear, fear that it’s wickedness or weakness
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| Fear, whatever it is, both is distinctive
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| Fear, what happens on Earth stays on Earth
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| And I can’t take these feelings with me
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| So hopefully they disperse
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| Within fourteen tracks, carried out over wax
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| Searchin' for resolutions until somebody get back
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| Fear, what happens on Earth stays on Earth
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| And I can’t take these feelings with me
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| So hopefully they disperse
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| Within fourteen tracks, carried out over wax
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| Wonderin' if I’m livin' through fear or livin' through rap
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| Damn
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| Goddamn you
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| Goddamn me
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| Goddamn us
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| Goddamn we
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| Goddamn us all
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| Verse two says you only have I known of all the families of the Earth,
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| therefore I will punish you for all your iniquities. |
| So until we come back to
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| these commandments, until you come back to these commandments, we’re gonna feel
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| this way, we’re gonna be under this curse. |
| Because he said he’s gonna punish us,
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| the so-called Blacks, Hispanics, and Native American Indians, are the true
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| children of Israel. |
| We are the Israelites according to the Bible.
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| The children of Israel, he’s gonna punish us for our iniquities,
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| for our disobedience, because we chose to follow other gods that aren’t his
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| son, so the Lord, thy God, chasten thee. |
| So, just like you chasten your own son,
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| he’s gonna chastise you because he loves you. |
| So that’s why we get chastised,
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| that’s why we’re in the position we’re in. Until we come back to these laws,
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| statutes and commandments, and do what the Lord said, these curses are gonna
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| be upon us. |
| We’re gonna be at a lower state in this life that we live here in
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| today, in the United States of America. |
| I love you, son, and I pray for you.
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| God bless you, shalom. |