| Back before I was a movie star
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| Straight off of the farm
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| I had a picture of another man’s wife
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| Tattooed on my arm
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| With a pack of Camel cigarettes
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| In the sleeve of my tee shirt
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| I’m headin' out to Hollywood
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| Just to have my feelings hurt
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| That town will make you crazy
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| Just give it a little time
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| You’ll be walking 'round in circles
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| Down at Hollywood and Vine
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| You’ll be waitin' on a phone call
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| At the wrong end of a broom
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| Yes, that town’ll make you crazy
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| Crazy as a loon
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| So, I headed down to Nashville
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| To become a country star
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| Every night you’d find me hangin'
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| At every honky-tonk and bar
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| Pretty soon I met a woman
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| Pretty soon she done me wrong
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| Pretty soon my life got sadder
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| Than any country song
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| That town will make you crazy
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| Just give it a little time
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| You’ll be walking 'round in circles
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| Lookin' for that country rhyme
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| You’ll be waitin' on a phone call
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| At the wrong end of a broom
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| Yea, that town’ll make you crazy
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| Crazy as a loon
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| So, I gathered up my savvy
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| Bought myself a business suit
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| I headed up to New York City
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| Where a man can make some loot
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| I got hired Monday morning
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| Downsized that afternoon
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| Overcome with grief that evening
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| Now I’m crazy as a loon
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| So I’m up here in the north woods
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| Just staring at a lake
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| Wondering just exactly how much
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| They think a man can take
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| I eat fish to pass the time away
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| 'Neath this blue Canadian moon
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| This old world has made me crazy
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| Crazy as a loon
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| Lord, this world will make you crazy
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| Crazy as a loon |