| You know, if a chicken could talk
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| He might say something like this
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| Why’s everybody pickin' on the chicken?
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| What did a chicken ever do to you?
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| Why’s everybody pickin' on the chicken?
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| What a crock of cock-a-doodle-doo, bawk
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| Now I’m not the kinda bird to squawk
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| But seems like these days, folks can’t talk
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| Without somehow slandering the chicken’s name
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| Buck, buck, buck, buck, buck
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| But bigotry and discrimination
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| Dominate the syntax of this whole nation
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| It’s enough to drive a dumb dominecker insane
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| They say «flew the coop» when a thief’s departed
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| And if he’s lacking courage, he’s «chicken-hearted»
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| And if he messes up, «he's got egg on his face»
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| He’ll work for «chicken feed» or «hatch a scheme»
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| Something’s «stuck in his craw», see what I mean?
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| Demeaning references to chickens are commonplace
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| «Bird brain», «dumb cluck», «no spring chicken», «strut your stuff»
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| «Nest egg», «bad egg», «shake your tail feather», «cocky» and such
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| «Laid an egg», «in a stew», I don’t know what a chicken can do
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| You know being a chicken in this environment is «nothing to crow about»
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| No, a chicken’s life is not all it’s «cracked up to be»
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| And stop questioning my motives about crossing the road, I don’t know why I did
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| it
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| Hey, I’m a chicken, yeah
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| Maybe I did it to show the possum it could be done, or sing a duet with Willie
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| Nelson
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| What difference does it make? |
| I crossed the road, okay? |
| Get over it!
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| Bawk
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| And it’s time to stop pickin' on the chicken
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| I mean, what a chicken ever did to you?
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| It’s time to stop pickin' on the chicken
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| What a crock of cock-a-doodle-doo
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| «Don't count your chickens before they hatch» and «don't put all your eggs in
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| one basket»
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| And «don't put up a squawk» or «all your chickens might come home to roost»
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| People get «up with the chickens» or «go to bed with the chickens»
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| Or are concerned about the «pecking order»
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| He’s the «cock of the walk», «he rules the roost»
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| «Broods» over problems like «empty nest syndrome»
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| You know what makes me «madder than a wet hen»?
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| What does every strange thing from frog legs to rattlesnake taste like?
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| That’s right, chicken
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| Finding some sort of reference that doesn’t include a chicken is is is «as rare has hen’s teeth»
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| Bawk, now you’ve got me doing it
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| I’ll be so upset before long I’ll be «running around like a chicken with its
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| head cut off»
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| Okay, bawk, I can’t believe I said that, bawk
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| Somebody stop me, bawk
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| «What came first, the chicken or the egg?»
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| Oh, «I feel like I’m walking on eggs»
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| I feel «hen-pecked»
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| Why did the punk rocker cross the road?
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| He was stapled to the chicken
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| You know, «it ain’t over 'til the fat chicken sings» and that’s me
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| Is this any good or did I just «lay an egg»?
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| Bawk |