| I remember the rosary, the Catechism and the stations of the cross
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| The plenary indulgence and i know it isn’t this
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| Depression and nightmares and panic through and through
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| Although i have been successful, there is always more to d
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| There are many things i know i have done to help me to survive
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| But i will never tell anyone as long as i am alive
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| It seems at times there is no way out, not any to escape
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| Because of abuse and turmoil and trauma and of rape
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| I feel eyes upon me every minute of the day
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| Hiding all around me, i turn my head away
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| I’ve seen them in my bedroom when i am exhausted and done
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| I’ve been seeing them for years, but i’ve never told anyone
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| I am walking into doors and walls 'cause i am not all there
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| I’ve split from a reality, of what i didn’t want to share
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| I can tune out conversations and with what the outside world is
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| Then sex just didn’t matter in my relationships
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| You can’t rely on feelings when love and trust is first betrayed
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| I enter sexual situations, i really didn’t even want to make
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| 'Cause i was anxious, i was bored, or any non-sexual need
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| When abuse is matched with affection or protection it misleads
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| I say, «Drop what you do and listen, 'cause now it’s me that calls the shots.»
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| This is the sign of a life of out of control adults
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| I sometimes drink to oblivion, in spite of what i know
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| I sometimes create chaos anywhere i go
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| Always anxious, always have to move to help me to forget
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| Feelings of little value or humiliation yet
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| Because there was no one there for me, i expect people to leave
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| So, i repeatedly test them and this is what you’ve done to me
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| I know they way i’ve overworked myself has turned out positively
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| And that many other people don’t have my opportunities
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| But goodness, yeah, you can make it, You are well on your way to heal
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| Because you already know it, and you already know the deal
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| You are not alone, this is sadism, and this is not your fault
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| And who would choose to live through this, so it is not yours at all
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| And you know this was given to you, so let’s put it out of your home
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| And you know that this is not yours, and you are not alone… you are not alone |